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Sometimes I Feel Like a Childless Mother

No calls on AC for several days and when they do flood in, the first set is all “fantasy baseball” – so clearly my area of expertise /sarcasm – and then the next batch are all “you must be a mom to write this” calls.  And I find them irritating.   Only one is a call for stepmoms, for one thing.  And they only want to hear your infertility woes if there was a happy ending (aka successfully having a child, not coming to terms and embracing your childlessness).  That’s fine, it’s their website, they can ask for whatever subjects they want.  And I, as a free citizen, am free to resent the hell out of it.  Especially when they take up valuable call space for something called “poop stories” (“I shit you not”, as it were).

Now, I’ve got no problem with moms (or baseball for that matter).  I have one and she’s great.  What I have a problem with is the idea that having a child somehow makes a person better than those people who don’t have children.

Am I overreacting?  Sure, probably.  Right at the moment, I’m in the midst of my body’s little reminder that I’m not pregnant (nor likely ever will be), and that tends to make me overly sensitive.  Most especially when the outside world feels the need to shove my face in the fact of my childlessness as well. 

There are plenty of shitty parents with a virtual battalion of children and I can’t have one – and most of the time I’m ok with that.  Most of the time I accept, rather gracefully, that I am probably better off not having any children for many reasons.  But not when I’m made to feel inferior because of it. 

Biologically, it’s what our bodies are designed to do.  It isn’t some amazing feat to be able to bear a child – the fact that our planet is over-crowded and evolution (by way of God, the universe, Mr. Rogers – whichever you happen to believe) has increased both infertility and homosexuality in an effort to stem the tide of overpopulation notwithstanding.  It’s what you do with that life when it arrives that counts – but we really don’t need 40 articles on it.  There is already a day devoted to you.


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